Monday, February 6, 2012

To Ruben: Two Years On




Huero, it was two years ago today that you were taken suddenly and uselessly from your family and legion of friends. You left behind some great gifts, such as the memory of a funny and unpunctual guy who could be unconditionally counted upon in any situation. The gift you promised to someone by registering as an organ donor, should the worst happen, was bestowed on me. For this there is no adequate expression of thanks that can be expressed via written or spoken word.

When I first met your family, I promised to honor you and your gift by trying in all possible ways to be the best transplant recipient I could be. I hope my actions this past year have so far accomplished fulfillment of that promise. I carry your picture and story with me to every organ donation advocacy event I attend. Many people who are instantly adverse to speaking about registration see your photo, hear yours and my stories, and at least go away with a marginally-better point of view. I share your decision to donate in my talks to high school classes, benefit fairs, college classes, churches and hospital employee education groups. I hope I have in some minuscule way influenced a donation decision or helped a transplant candidate know that, yes, it can and does really happen.

Yesterday Cherie and I visited your gravesite. We laid flowers on the stone, and stood silently thinking of your contribution in getting me to this point in my life. Then, your brother Anthony and a group of your friends arrived. We met and spoke, and I received many handshakes, good wishes and even a hug from them. I couldn't help but notice the incredible T-shirts several of the guys wore, with colorful images of you on the front. One read on the reverse side "I've got your back". I think from what I have been told, this phrase characterized you as a son, brother, uncle, nephew and valuable friend that could be counted upon always. When the cervezas were broken out, we unfortunatly had to leave. I would have loved to crack one open in your honor.

I have considered myself to be relatively humorous, a good husband, dad, son, grandson, nephew, cousin and a stalwart friend. I hope there are more similarities than differences in our accomplishments in these areas, Ruben.

As we observe the two-year anniversary of my transplant this Thursday, we will all be happy that I am still around enjoying all the people and things around me. But our happiness is due to your gift, and everyone who knows me, knows that, too.



Descansa en paz, Huero.

Bob/Irv

1 comment:

  1. What a beautiful letter, Bob. I'd like to believe Huero has heard it, and understands you. I love the honor you bestow upon your donor. If more recipients were like you, I think there'd be a lot more love and less pain in the world.
    Thank you for sharing Rueben with us today in Moraga. It was wonderful to see you and Cheryl. Thank you for your service. You are an exceptional human being and I'm so grateful that Rueben saved you. I love you, Bob,
    hugs,
    Isa

    ReplyDelete

RJ/Bob/Irv is a 61-year-old beloved husband, father, uncle, brother, motor racing fanatic, and Livermore resident who received a heart and kidney transplant in February of 2010. Bob's recent years have been defined by his health, which forced him into early retirement. Unfortunately, many of his days were spent in a dialysis center or at various medical appointments, primarily due to his living with diabetes for over 40 years. Numerous were panic visits to various Emergency Rooms all over California for treatment of chest pain. But now no more dialysis and no more late-night dashes to UCSF! The main focus of Bob's family, friends, and doctors has been a prompt transplant, so that he can get back to traveling with his Sweetie, driving fast cars, enjoying great music and laughing with his friends. This blog will function as a way to communicate with all interested parties and to keep everyone informed. And hopefully it can serve a great purpose also, in making people more aware of the importance of organ donation and how each life saved has a positive effect on dozens of related friends and relatives.